Santa Baby
by the Black Rose
Summary: HYxRP--Complete--Maxwell, I had a beard over half my face, white hair covering my forehead and glued to my eyebrows, and store-bought mag glasses obstructing my vision. I couldn't have been looking at her in any way that you could tell from five feet away
1. People are like the snow

**Santa Baby**

By the Black Rose

AN: I've never written a holiday fic before. So, I wanted to try to do one this year. I haven't done a good job of buying presents for people, so hopefully…maybe this will suffice, somewhat, as a gift to you all. Thank you so much for reading. Love, Rose

Warnings: Christmas and Christmas traditions contained within. I apologize if that offends you in any way.

**Prologue**

The weather proclaimed it was winter, and the calendar nudged closer and closer to Christmas Day. Relena had agreed to spend her holiday traveling this year, her duties as the ESUN Foreign Minister seemed to be ironically more necessary at this time of year - when peace and love were touted almost universally.

"Not that I had anyone else to spend the holiday with." Relena's breath puffed tiny clouds of vapor in the winter air. She stood on the front porch of her home, back from a long day of work, but not quite ready to face the emptiness indoors. It was twilight. The days had grown so short so quickly. And a thin layer of snow already dusted the ground.

"Not since…"

_"Relena…"_

His deep voice sounded so real inside her head, she had to turn to make sure he wasn't there.

_She couldn't look at him. "You know how I feel. I don't think I can say it again."_

_"I'm sorry." His tone was low, but never wavered._

_Relena turned around when she heard his footsteps. "It doesn't have to be this way. Please don't--"_

_He stopped. "It can't work between us. I do…I will always protect you. But, it's all I can do."_

Relena stared up at the night sky and wondered for the thousandth time where he was, how he was doing…. If he was happy.

"Have you found someone?" She asked the stars. Tears collected, unbidden in her eyes. The cold wind threatened to turn them to ice as it swept over and chilled her exposed skin.

"It's Christmas time, again. And people always ask me what I wish for. I tell them all the right things about peace on earth and the colonies, food for the hungry, and shelter for the homeless. And I do wish for those things." She brought a gloved hand up to her chest, closed her eyes and bowed her head.

"But the one wish I hold closest to my heart is that you were here. And if I can't have that wish for myself, because I know it's selfish of me, then I just ask that wherever you are, you're happy."

"Heero…."

* * *

Heero tossed and turned in his bed, twisting the cool sheets around his calves. The air in his room felt chilly; the heater turned off at night, and the temperature sank in the climate controlled 'winter' of the L2 colony X2376 sector. "Hnnnnn…Relena…"

The name on his lips jolted him awake. 'I wasn't really asleep.' He wiped a hand over his face and pulled the comforter on his twin bed out of its self-made jumble and back over his legs.

But sleep was an infrequent guest these days. And 'she' was an ever-present vision in his mind. "Why am I thinking about her? It's been two years…"

_"Heero, I don't understand why it is you still shut me out. I told you I--"_

_He didn't want to hear it. It was a lie, anyway. "This isn't working, Relena."_

_"It isn't working because you won't open up. When you said we could give our relationship a try, I thought you really meant it." She looked up at him with that pleading expression on her face. _

'I knew you'd get tired of me, eventually.'

_"I did." His right fist tightened so much he felt his knuckles might break._

_"This isn't trying, Heero. Trying isn't standing there when I kiss you, not pushing me away when I hug you, and 'enduring' me when I talk to you."_

_He looked away. "I can't be what you want, Relena."_

_"I'm not asking you to change! I'm only asking you to let me know you, all of--" _

_"There's nothing else to know."_

She didn't cry. Relena wasn't like the girls in movies or television, the emotionally charged females who seemed to cry with little provocation. She simply stepped back, bowed her head, and turned away. It was the second to last time he ever saw her face to face, the last time being when he told her he was leaving.

She didn't cry then, either.

Heero pulled the pillow over his head and groaned. She had moved on. He had just been someone for her to take pity on.

"We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year."

Heero pulled the comforter over the pillow on top of his head. Carolers. Some people had to be up at four in the morning, and didn't want to listen to carolers at nine o'clock at night.

It made him remember things, like how Christmas was her favorite time of year…

_She twirled around in the snowfall like they were kids out at recess. Her tongue flicked out every so often to try to catch snowflakes in her mouth. She paused when she caught sight of him just standing there, watching her. His hands shoved in his pockets, his Preventers jacket buttoned tight, and a scarf wound around his neck to keep him warm._

_"The snow always makes the Earth look so beautiful."_

_He frowned. "It's cold."_

_She laughed. The winter wind had reddened her cheeks and the tip of her nose. "It's cold, but white, pristine - like it's all brand new." Her expression turned serious. She chewed her lip between her teeth before continuing. "I think people can be like that."_

_He arched an eyebrow. "People."_

_"Yes. I think that people can start living their life one way, following a particular path, but--"_

_"Change roads?" His lips cracked from being so chapped._

_"Something like that."_

_His body shivered despite his efforts. "They don't start over."_

_"They do in a way."_

_"But their past is still their past. Just because they change their minds, doesn't erase--"_

_She took his arm, and he no longer felt cold. "It's like the snow. It's not erased." She bent down a scooped a handful off the ground. "See? The grass is still there. The snow is just…a new footing, a clean slate laid over the top of the old." She stood; her blue eyes stared up at him. _

_"You don't forget the past, but you can go forward without looking back."_

If that was true…

Why couldn't he?


	2. So I have to sit here and play Santa all...

Santa Baby

By the Black Rose

AN: Merry Christmas to you. Merry Christmas to you. I tortured Heero and Duo. For a Christmas gift to you. Thanks for reading! Love, Rose

Warnings: Santa abuse. Christmas traditions.

**Chapter 1**

A chill had settled into the mansion. An undeniable emptiness. But it wasn't the winter that brought it. Relena stepped into the foyer, while still buttoning her coat.

"Your car is waiting, Madame."

She frowned at the old gentleman. "Pagan, please. How many times have I asked you not to call me that?"

"But, Miss Relena. You're an adult, now. It only seems right."

"Well, it doesn't seem right to me. So, please, call me Relena." She went back to fastening the belt around her jacket.

"Miss Relena, your car is still waiting."

She sighed. "Yes, Pagan. I know." She stopped fiddling with her belt and felt her shoulders sag. "I feel terrible for leaving you behind on the holidays, but space travel..."

"You don't have to worry for me, Miss Relena. Just have a nice Christmas on the colony, and take care of yourself."

She managed a small smile - for his sake. "I'll try. You take care, too."

He bowed at the waist. "Of course."

The driver entered, rubbing his hands together at a furious pace, and blowing hot air against them. "Ya all ready ta go?"

She nodded. The driver grinned and picked up her bag, hauling it out the front door. He packed it away in the trunk while she let herself into the back of the car. Relena settled in for the short ride to the shuttle port.

Her hand came up to rest on the window where she could see Pagan standing in the doorway. It didn't seem right to leave the man who was like a grandfather behind during Christmas. But duty called, and she always had to answer….

_"I'm sorry, Heero. I…have a dinner meeting." She hated having to lie to him. But she just couldn't tell him, yet. If at all. _

_He merely nodded. No hint of an expression on his face. But something had flickered in his eyes. Or maybe it was her imagination._

_"Duty calls, then."_

_His voice sounded strange. Strangled. A slight frown formed above his eyes. Why? Why did he look like… _

_"Yes." She had to glance away. "Always does."_

It wasn't long after, that Heero had left. But she still didn't understand…

What did she do to make him walk away?

* * *

The carolers had kept him awake far longer than he intended. Or maybe it was his memories of her… Either way, it was six in the morning, and there was no coffee strong enough to make him capable of tolerating his partner's yelling. And pacing.

Heero scowled and poured himself another mug. He'd almost drained his coffee pot. If Duo didn't get off his phone, soon, the former Zero pilot would be forced to go for reserves in the community break room down the hall. But whomever usually brewed that stuff made sludge. Heero had to be a desperate man indeed to resort to it.

"Wait a minute, Wufei. What do you mean, it's our only chance? How am I supposed to pull this off?" Duo shouted into the phone while carving trenches into the tile floor of Heero's office with his shoes.

"Think of something? Think of something?" He bent over to roar into the receiver. "I'm not the brains of this operation, you know."

Heero snorted and took another large swig of his black coffee.

"Yes, I know you know." His partner's face tightened into a frown. "Ha. Ha. Yeah, real funny. Don't quit your day job." Duo shot straight up. "Wufei!"

The man with the braid whirled around. "He hung up!" He shook the phone in Heero's direction.

The rather disgruntled Preventer shrugged. He squinted at the monitor on his laptop, the light coming in that window he didn't want open made it tough to see certain areas of his report.

"Heero, do you know what that, that…anal retentive, justice-touting, pain in my ass just told me?"

A smile tugged at his lips and lost. "You mean Wufei?"

"Yes! That-that--"

Heero closed his eyes and sighed. "Stop grousing and tell me what he said."

Duo flopped down in a chair opposite the desk. "He said that we have to meet with an informant tomorrow."

"Hn." Finally. The caffeine was kicking it. He tapped a few keys to fill in holes in the report.

"Not just ANY informant. We have to meet with the one on the Scholtzberg case."

Heero whirled around in his chair. "There's been a crack in the Scholtzberg case? They got an informant?"

Duo slumped onto the desk. "You haven't heard the worst of it."

"Maxwell. Senator Scholtzberg is on the Colony defense committee. If he's been accepting bribes--"

"We have to meet the informant tomorrow." He shook his head against the arm lying flat on the desktop. "At a department store. In the middle of the day."

"Preventer needs that information. We'll go no matter what the risk." Heero crossed his arms and glared down at his friend.

Duo propped his head up on his hand. "I'm glad you said that, buddy. I'll be reminding you of that tomorrow."

**Twenty-seven hours and fifty minutes later….**

Heero held his breath and counted to ten. "Tell me again how I let you talk me into this?"

He glowered at his green clad partner who looked…ridiculous didn't quite cover it. His long braid was stuffed into a cone-shaped green, fuzzy hat, pulled down low over his forehead. He had two pointy, plastic ears attached via a piece of elastic hidden by the hat. Two red blotches of rouge stained his cheeks. But that wasn't the worst part. Heero couldn't decide if the curly-toed shoes or the tights were more humiliating for his friend.

"Hey. You were the one who said this was so important, the risk didn't matter." Duo shrugged his elven shoulders.

Heero rested his arms on his protruding stomach. "I have a gun, Maxwell. I was talking about bringing a gun."

"Well, you'd better not shoot the elf in front of all those children, Santa, or Preventer will be paying their therapy bills until they're thirty."

The former Zero pilot grit his teeth behind the false white beard and mustache combination currently scratching the hell out of his chin. "Just tell me one thing. Was this your idea or Wufei's?"

"The informant is going to bring his or her child to visit Santa. They're going to give the elf, me, a Christmas list. The child will sit on your lap, tell you what they want, like you're the regular, jolly old St. Nick, and then they'll go along their merry way. The Christmas list they give me is supposed to have the coded information we asked for."

"When?"

"Sometime today. Santa's hours are from ten am to six pm. You do, however, get an hour for lunch."

"So, I have to sit here and play Santa Claus all day."

"Hey, we're lucky we got the department store to go along with this. Their Santa is a professional impersonator. Famous people take their children here, and do all sorts of charity and publicity things. This isn't some rinky dink operation, you know."

"So, you're saying this is Wufei's fault."

"More or less."

"Remind me to kill him the next time I go to Earth."

"Fat chance." Duo paused, looked his partner up and down and burst out into giggles. "Ah ha ha ha ha ha! I said fat chance! And with you wearing a Santa suit."

Heero grimaced, then turned to take a last look in the mirror - to make sure his costume was on straight, and nothing appeared out of place. He almost didn't recognize himself. The fuzzy red hat ended with sewn-in white curls that covered his forehead, and draped down the back of his neck. He had to wear padding under the red coat, which he could already tell was trapping his body heat, and would make him uncomfortably warm throughout the day. His matching, red pants ended in a pair of black patent leather boots. He looked like… An overstuffed, over grown elf with an attitude problem.

"I'm Santa Claus." Heero sighed.

"You can't forget these!" The equally as pathetic looking elf chirped beside him. He pivoted to receive the outstretched round-lens glasses to apparently complete the costume. His eyes were the only recognizable trait left. He donned the frames and stomped out of the dressing room towards "Santa's Enchanted Cave". It was ten o'clock exactly.

* * *

Heero arrived out in front of Santa's…throne, to adults pointing and whispering to their children: "Look, it's Santa!"

The line wasn't too long, probably fifteen or sixteen separate kids waited their turns with their parents. Some were toddlers and babies, others probably as old as nine or ten. It was, thankfully, a weekday, though less than a week before Christmas. He figured it wouldn't be too bad during the morning, but once parents got off work…

Duo brought the first child up and hefted him into Heero's lap. Santa blinked at the little boy on his knee while the mother handed the elf a written Christmas list.

"Aren't you going to say Ho Ho Ho?" The kid's voice whined.

Heero stared at the boy and held him in place at the farthest edge of his lap.

"Say cheese!" The photographer called out and snapped a picture of Santa and child.

"You're supposed to say Ho Ho Ho." The boy's tone sounded like nails across a chalkboard.

Heero tried to stop himself from snarling at the little know-it-all. "Ho. Ho….Ho."

The child wrinkled his nose. "You're not s'pposed to say it like that. It's s'pposed to be jolly. Like a laugh."

"Just tell me what you want for Christmas."

The boy crossed his arms and stuck out his bottom lip. "Don you need to ask my name, first?"

Heero shut his eyes and counted to five. "Fine. Tell me your name."

"Christopher."

"Okay, now what do you want for Christmas?"

"I didn't tell you my last name. There's three Christophers in my class at school. Can you imagine how many there are in just this one colony?"

This time he couldn't stop from snarling. "I thought it would be on your Christmas list your mom gave my…helper." He reigned in his temper. "But fine, give me your last name."

"Christopher Donnally."

"Okay. Now. Christopher Donally. What do you want for Christmas?"

"I want a Death base model and a Space Wars action figure! A bb gun and a live toad, so I can put it in my older sister's bed."

Heero raised an eyebrow. It felt weird with the fake ones glued to his face.

"I want a legoland mobile suit factory kit and all the toys I saw on TV this week. Hot wheels star racer, and--"

"I think that's more than enough." Duo cut in and started to pick the boy out of Heero's lap.

"Whoa whoa whoa, wait." He waved the elf away. "I thought only good boys and girls got presents from Santa."

"I'm good." Christopher's voice went up an octave. Heero winced.

"I help my mom set the table, and I cleaned my room yesterday. Even if I din want to."

"Why do you want a toad to put in your older sister's bed?"

"She picks on me!"

"Gotta go. Lots of kids want to visit Santa." Duo tried again to 'rescue' the little boy in Heero's lap.

"That's not an excuse. If you want a present from Santa, you have to be good. Even to your older sister. Especially to your older sister."

The little boy appeared stricken.

Duo finally snagged Christopher and set him down on his feet.

"I don't have to be nice to her! She's not nice to me first!"

"If you want a present, you'll be nice to her and your mother."

"I hate you!" The kid reared back and delivered a kick to Heero's shin.

Christopher's mom gasped. "I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over him." She grabbed her son's hand and pulled him several feet away. "Christopher, you do not kick Santa Claus, do you understand me?"

"He's mean! He said I wouldn't get any presents!"

"I said you had to be nice to get them." He wanted to reach down and rub the spot on his shin, but wouldn't give the little brat the satisfaction. Besides, it more surprised Heero than injured him.

"Come along Christopher. And you'd better behave or you're getting a spanking when we get home."

The kid twisted at the end of his mom's arm as she tried to drag him away. "No, mom! I don wanna!"

Heero turned away from the sight to come face to face with the annoying elf. Duo had his arms crossed over his chest and was trying to glare down Santa Claus. He tapped his curly toed shoe against the tile floor. There was no way Maxwell looked anything close to menacing in that outfit. "Try not to scare the children."

"I didn't scare him. I told him the rules."

"Just ask them what they want for Christmas and then go on to the next child. We don't have time for you to lecture each six year old that comes through here on the finer points of being nice to a sibling."

Heero scowled. But somehow he figured his painted rosy cheeks didn't convey his irritation well, either. He settled for motioning the next kid over to sit on Santa's lap.

* * *

It took two hours to get through the original line. At noon, Santa and Elf shuffled through the Christmas lists in search of the coded info. Nothing.

"Dammit. When is the damned informant going to get here."

"It doesn't matter when he or she arrives. We have to play Santa and his helper all day. Your shift ends at six whether the informer arrives at noon or five fifty-nine."

"My head just started pounding when you said that."

"Sorry, pal. I'll buy you a beer as soon as we're done. Or seven."

"Hn." Heero tried and failed to cross his arms. He had to settle for resting his hands on his belly. It was disconcerting.

"I dunno, Heero. Kids just aren't the same as they used to be. Or maybe it's just that we're at this high-dollar mall. But ya know, when I was a kid, I didn't need all these material things. I didn't have a real family, but the family I did have… When I asked God or even Santa for things, I didn't ask for myself. I asked for stuff for Father Maxwell and Sister Helen. The other orphans in Maxwell Church that weren't as lucky as me."

Heero took a deep breath and watched his stomach rise and fall with the movement. It was odd. He flicked his wrist and checked his watch. Sadly, it wasn't six, yet. The line was still empty, so he was 'free' to listen to Maxwell's rambling.

Duo sat down on top of one of the candy canes. "If I did ask for something for myself, it was clothes or shoes. Maybe food. Not these crappy pieces of plastic someone fashioned into a model of a weapon. What's wrong with these people? Don't they know the true spirit of Christmas?"

"You done?"

"Yeah. Sorry. I know I sound like an old geezer whining about the latest generation of young little whipper snappers or something." The elf rested his chin on top of his palm; his arm was propped on his knee - just above those ridiculous shoes.

Heero shook his head. "These kids are brats. But that doesn't mean that everyone with or without money is like these children or their parents."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

A pair of women toting three kids a piece entered the line. The toddler, Timmy, decided Santa was his new litter box, prompting the comment from Duo: "Oh hell, I wonder if urine stains."

Apparently, the red, fuzzy coat and nice-guy beard wasn't enough to keep the former Gundam pilot from scaring little Bethany, the four year old who screamed at the top of her lungs as soon as Heero tried to pick her up. He swore his ears were going to ring the rest of the day.

Madison and Mackenzie, the twins, wanted the latest 'Holiday Glitz Barbie', her mansion, her car, her jetliner, her yacht, and her private island resort. Complete with paid servants. Hunter and Regan, the two boys aged five and eight, wanted army men and assorted small to medium range weapons.

Heero sighed. Mankind had been at peace for four years, now, and children either were still playing war games, or had never been taught otherwise.

He laughed as an image of an eight year old Relena came to mind - talking to her brother's army men, trying to get them to lay down their weapons.

It was a memory that didn't happen, of course, just something he could envision. 'Only her….'

The latest hellions moved on, leaving behind a Santa that was a little more frazzled, a lot more damp, and infinitely more ready for the day to be over - and he was smelly. It was barely one o'clock. But at least it was time for lunch.

Santa and Elf gladly escaped for their hour-long break. The manager brought them a sandwich and coke in the grove behind Santa's Enchanted Cave. Heero pulled the beard down to his neck in order to eat.

"You have gotten your information, yes?" The manager, a man with black, greasy hair and a pencil thin neck asked with his hands flat together like he was praying.

"No," Heero said around bites of his sandwich.

"Oh, I see." The man dropped his hands.

"Why?"

"Oh, I…It is nothing."

"Spill it." Heero took another bite and glared at the man.

"I was just hoping that we could have our regular Santa return for the afternoon." He brought his hands up like he was trying to hold Heero back. "Not that you are not a wonderful Santa, just…"

"You agreed to the terms Preventer set down. And the payment." Duo popped the last bite of sandwich into his mouth and took a swig of his coke.

The manager bowed his head and his shoulders sagged. "I know. And if you must stay all day, then you must."

"Why? What's going on this--?"

"We need a manager to lingerie. Manager to lingerie." A nasal-sounding woman's voice called over the loud speaker.

The man instantly perked up. He threw them a weird grin and wave and started off at a quick gait.

"Hey! You didn't answer our question."

"Sorry little elf. But lingerie calls, yes? Ta!" And the pencil necked manager was gone.

Heero glared at the man's retreat. "This isn't good."

Duo sighed and slumped in his seat. "I thought this morning was bad enough. I don't want to go back out there."

Santa wiped his mouth and pulled the white beard back over his features. "Come on. We've faced down mobile dolls and Oz soldiers. No two year old named Timmy is going to keep me from doing my job."

Duo rolled his eyes. "Words to live by."

Heero stood up and straightened his belly, belt, and pants. "Shut up. And you owe me seven beers when all this is over." He started stomping off in the direction of the enchanted cave.

The elf's voice called after him: "That's just not right coming from Santa Claus."


	3. We should get a shot of Ms Darlian telli...

Heero and Duo are still stuck in Santa's Enchanted Cave, praying for their informant to show up, and hoping any manner of natural disaster might happen and shut down the department store.

AN: Personally, I'd like to obsess over this chapter a little more. But I still have one more to go. Thanks for reading! Love, Rose

**Santa Baby**

by the Black Rose

Chapter 2

Heero opened the curtain to face a mob. A screaming, throbbing, swirling mob. He fought the urge to rub a hand over his face, seeing as it could dislodge the spirit gum holding on his white eyebrows, and streak his 'rosy' cheeks.

"This sucks," his ever-cheerful elf muttered behind him.

"Go collect Christmas lists like you're supposed to."

"Yeah yeah." Duo trudged off in the direction of the front of the line. 

Heero quickly counted heads. It looked like there were about twenty-four kids in line. He needed to keep each visit as brief as possible. It was when he said too much that the kids got nasty, kicked his shin, or tried to use his beard as toilet paper.

Two hours later...

The line was empty again. Heero sat back and breathed a sigh of relief. It was four o'clock, only two more hours to go. His head lolled to his left. "Anything yet?"

Duo continued sorting through the lists. "No. Nothing."

Santa closed his eyes. This was nightmarish. Actually, he didn't think he had nightmares this bad. At least not in a long, long time. 

He clamped his eyes shut tighter at the sound of footsteps. Many footsteps. Like a crowd moving together. And a voice, calling out in a loud tone that echoed off the tile all around them.

"We're here. I need you to line up single file. It's okay if you're not first, because Santa won't leave until he's heard everyone's wish, ok?" She sounded patient, far more patient than he was capable of at this point, and kind. Very kind. He peeked through his eyelashes. 

Heero's eyes opened wide when he saw her. At first, he thought he was hallucinating. He blinked, shot a look over at Duo, who with one glance, confirmed he was not. A familiar woman with long, blond hair - one he would have known anywhere - stood in the center of a gaggle of kids. Munchkins of all sizes, shapes, and color, crowded around her, none of them rising higher than her waist. A couple of guards stood by the door. Heero could pick them out by their dark suits. And accompanying the foreign minister on this trip were a woman with a microphone, a guy with a camera, and another, taller man wearing a suit - who seemed to need to lean down every so often and whisper something in Relena's ear. The children, for their part, seemed to be listening to their 'guardian', and had started to form a line.

The tall man left the foreign minister and jogged over to Santa's cave.

As he approached, his features became clearer, and Heero realized it was someone he didn't recognize. Which meant it wasn't 'him'.

"Hi. We called and spoke with the manager, earlier."

"Who are you."

The tall man smiled and held out a hand to St. Nick. "I'm John Parker, I work for Ms. Darlian's office. I'm her publicist."

"I see." Heero regarded the hand a moment before shaking.

"Ms. Darlian, Relena, every year, she takes war orphans to visit Santa as one of her causes. We called earlier and the manager said it wouldn't be a problem. We have forty kids, though, and I know you close in two hours. Ms. Darlian personally requested that you stay long enough for all of the children to see and get their picture taken with Santa." The muscles around his eyes tightened, and Heero realized the guy was really afraid Santa would say no.

He closed his eyes and sighed. "Fine."

"We have a reporter accompanying us this time. Apparently, they found out... Relena doesn't really like the idea, but she thought it might raise awareness."

He frowned. "Spit it out."

"Well, we know you have your own photographer, and we wouldn't dream of getting in your way. But if you would allow them to shoot some footage of you with the children..."

Heero fought the urge bang his head against the back of Santa's throne. "Fine." Forty more kids. The things he did for her. He opened his eyes so he could at least see...

"I'll need you to sign this release."

Heero dragged his Relena and returned his focus to Mr. Parker - who was currently holding a pen and sheet of paper in Santa's direction. "What's the release for?"

"Just that you agree to let us use your image on the news story, etc. etc." He was wearing that tight expression again. The man was far too apologetic.

"Who gets the release?"

"The reporter. For the station."

Heero took a deep breath and nodded. He penned his name on the form in a rush. Mr. Parker smiled, shook Santa's hand and thanked him. "You really have no idea how much this means to the kids and to Ms. Darlian."

The Preventer closed his eyes again and rubbed his right temple with his hand. 'Yes. Yes I do.'

_ She was wearing a red sweater that seemed to brighten her hair and her eyes when she waltzed into the room. How was it that she always managed to look like she was floating on air?_

"Heero, why don't you go with me this year?" She placed both palms on his forearms.

"No."

He could see it: the pain he caused. So plainly written on her face. A brief sense of satisfaction flit through him, only to be replaced by guilt.

"But Heero, certainly you can relate to them. They lost their parents in the war."

"I fought in the war. How does that equate with relating to them?" He pulled out of her loose embrace and turned away.

"Heero, you could be a role model to these kids. They need people to look up to, someone to spend time with them. You have no idea how much it means to them just to spend a little time with someone, relating to them, talking to them. They're so eager to--"

He glanced back, over his shoulder. "I already told you no."

"I'm sorry. I won't ask again."

"My name is Kerridan." A little girl with dark brown hair said while tugging on the front of his pants' leg. She held a raggedy looking doll in her other hand.

Heero nodded. "I'm...Santa."

She grinned with missing teeth. "I know you're Santa."

He picked her up off the floor and settled her in his lap. The photographer snapped the picture. 

"What would you like for Christmas?"

She hugged the doll. "I want a mommy."

Heero blinked. "I don't know where your mommy is. Isn't there a toy or something you'd like me to bring you from my workshop?" He glanced out of the side of his eye; there was the cameraman, with his camera right on them, and the reporter nearby. It felt hotter in Santa's cave than it had all day.

"My mommy is in heaven."

Heero sucked in a breath and tried to keep his grip on the little girl. He didn't know if he could handle this. Bring back Christopher and his shin splintering, or Timmy and his leaky diaper. "I see." Just when he thought he had this whole 'Santa' thing down.

"But I want a new mommy. One like Miss...Miss Rewena."

"Okay." He looked up, asking for help from somewhere, anywhere. And found it in blue eyes he hadn't seen up close in years.

"Oh, Kerridan, sweety. You're supposed to tell Santa what you want for Christmas." Relena bent down and picked the girl up in her arms. Kerridan clung to her neck. 

"But thass what I want for Chrismus."

Relena continued to hug her tight as she carried her towards the exit of the enchanted cave. "But honey, Santa can't bring you that."

"Why not?"

"Because that's not what Santa's do. They bring toys and clothes and shoes and things that growing boys and girls need."

Santa never felt so useless in his life. He got the strange feeling that the assembled adults in the 'audience' were glaring at him. Heero glanced down; another child was inching his way towards the supposed owner of the cave.

"Tell me your name."

The little boy shook his head.

"You don't want to sit on my lap."

The little boy again, shook his head.

Heero groaned inwardly. "What do you want for Christmas?"

The boy took a step towards him, then another. He stopped when he was just in front of the arm of Santa's chair, and motioned Heero closer.

Santa leaned down to let the little boy whisper in his ear.

"I want some baseball shoes."

Heero nodded. "Okay. What else?"

The little boy stepped forward to whisper again. "A baseball glove."

"So you want baseball equipment."

The little boy shook his head. "I want to play on a baseball team. But I need someone to teach me to play."

_ They need people to look up to, someone to spend time with them._

Why did those words suddenly feel like a knife in his heart? He shoved the feeling aside. "Okay. So, no picture?" He reached towards the boy to pick him up. The kid backed away and ran towards the exit. 

Heero stared at the line and wondered how he was going to make it through this. At least with the brats from earlier, he could tell them to be good and maybe Santa would bring them those insipid toys. But what do you say to a child asking for a new mommy, or someone to teach them how to play baseball? Somehow, he didn't think he could lie to them. They believed he was Santa Claus, and if he said he'd bring them something, and then they didn't get it...

"It's okay." A soft voice said from behind him. Heero's shoulders tightened.

"I've already explained to them that you just take their wishes back to the real Santa. That you can't promise anything." She touched his arm. "But just hearing them out, spending time with them today, that's enough." 

Heero nodded and kept his head turned away. He didn't know that she would recognize him in the costume, but he didn't want to take that chance.

He waved the next child over. Kelly wanted dance shoes. Heero could handle that. Brittany wanted to see her little sister again. Santa wanted to crawl out of his skin.

A little boy, Sean, and his brother, Tom came up next. They wanted to go on a trip to Earth. They'd never seen it before. Then Tom confided: "I think my mommy and daddy are there."

Sean shushed his brother, and Heero tried to hold on to them for the picture to be taken.

It was a three hour emotional beating. Some of the kids requested clothing, new shoes, a doll or some sporting equipment. Some of them wanted families, to see relatives they missed - to find their lost puppy. His heart bled for them all, and by the time he'd seen the last one, he didn't know how anyone with less training could have survived. He was sure he'd seen the reporter cry more than once. Even now, Duo had tears in his eyes. 

And Heero knew they were all thinking he was the coldest Santa Claus in the universe.

"All right, Santa, Santa's little helper," the publicist began.

"We prefer to be called 'elves'. It's a little more pc," Duo interrupted.

"Oh hey, we should get a shot of Ms. Darlian telling Santa her Christmas wish," the reporter suggested. "For the piece."

Relena blushed, and Heero would have protested, if he'd thought of it. She looked to her publicist. John nodded at her and then rushed to take charge of the kids.

Santa remained frozen while Relena sat down in his lap. "I know, this is silly," she said in a low voice.

"Closer. Look like you're telling him your Christmas list."

Relena turned to look up at him. He tried to keep from flinching when she met his gaze. He hadn't seen her this close up in...far too long.

"Santa, this year I wish..."

He knew what she would wish for before she said it. It was the same list she gave every year.

"For peace to last another year between the Earth and its Colonies. For mankind to improve in understanding. I wish for another year without war, so that these children can grow up in a world that only knows peace."

"That's great, Relena. Thank you so much for letting us come with you today," the reporter said.

Relena's weight shifted so that she could stand up.

"What about your wish?" The words tumbled from his lips before he could stop them.

"Pardon?"

"What do you wish for?" 

The reporter and her cameraman were no longer paying attention. They were packing up equipment, getting ready to go. Duo was helping John corral the children, and the photographer had hightailed it out of there - probably to go home. They were alone.

"I don't have any wishes for myself."

He recognized his own words. But she didn't know what he had meant. "Everyone does."

_ "Why won't you tell me what you wish for, Heero? Why won't you let me in?"_

"I don't have any wishes for myself."

"I..." She looked down at her hands and folded them in her lap. "You're a department store Santa."

_ "Everyone has wishes. Everyone that has hope, has some wish--"_

"I don't need your pity, Relena."

"I take wishes to the real one."

"Ok ok. I wish...I wish that someone I care for..." She glanced up and stared into his eyes. "This is silly." She moved to stand up.

"You'd insult Santa Claus?" He held on to her at her waist. 

She sat back down and wrinkled her nose at him. "Okay, so, there's a man I used to... I still care for him very much, but...."

"But?" Heero swallowed against a lump in his throat. Did she mean--

"He left. Two years ago. I don't know where he is, but I'd like to know. I just want to know that he's found someone."

He closed his eyes. "That's not something for yourself."

"You don't understand. He's stubborn. He gets so focused on his work.... It's just not good for him to be alone. I-I worry about him. I want him to be happy. I..."

His hands tightened on her waist despite himself. He opened his eyes and met her gaze. "You love him."

She nodded her head turned away. "I always will."

Heero sucked in a breath. This couldn't be happening. This couldn't be.... His hand came up to move her hair so he could see her face, and then he remembered. She didn't know... She didn't know it was him.

"Thank you for listening." Relena stood up from his lap and turned to face him. He wanted to say a hundred, maybe a thousand things, but all he could do was nod.

She left, and took the children with her. Santa's Enchanted Cave closed for the night - the lights turned off. 

The magic gone.


	4. You heard my wish

**Santa Baby**

by the Black Rose

AN: I can't look at it any more. I've been looking at and working on this fic non-stop, or as close to non-stop as anyone can get, I'm convinced, for a week. Including 12 hours straight last Saturday. And so, I declare it done. Finito. Fin. Finished. Thank you so much for reading! Love, Rose

Chapter 3

Santa walked to the back of his Enchanted cave to remove the wretched, smelly, and urine-stained costume; his dutiful Elf followed, though he remained surprisingly silent. Heero pulled the red jacket off his shoulders.

_ Did she mean me? Or was it 'him' she's so concerned about?_

His eyes flickered over to Duo, who had just managed to get his hair loose from all the bobby pins that kept it up inside the pointy hat. He'll know what happened. _I'll have to ask him, later._

Heero felt his chest tighten as the memory of her…with another man--

His hands balled into fists, and he had to shake the image from his mind.

_I'll ask him much later._

"Rough day, huh?" Duo slung a bag over his shoulder as he and Heero exited the mall. "And we still have forty some odd Christmas lists to go through and find out if one of them is the one we're looking for."

Heero kept his eyes on the ground in front of him. "Can't be. Unless it came from Relena."

"Guess you're right. But we should still check, shouldn't we?" Duo's cheerful tone sounded strangely forced. 

   Heero shrugged it off. "Hn."

A hand dropped on his shoulder and halted his step. "How was it?" Duo asked.

Heero refused to turn around. "What?"

"Seeing her again?"

Heero shrugged his friend's hand off his shoulder.

"Don't try to pretend like you don't still care. I could see the way you were looking at her." 

The former Santa finally turned around. "Maxwell, I had a beard over half my face, white hair covering my forehead and glued to my eyebrows, and store-bought mag glasses obstructing my vision. I couldn't have been looking at her in any way that you could tell from five feet away."

"Call it intuition."

  Heero turned away. "We're not discussing this."

"She still cares about you."

Heero shut his eyes. "Maxwell," he said in the 'I'm warning you' tone.

"She never got over you."

He whirled around on his friend. "She has a funny way of showing it." Despite himself, his voice cracked. He dropped his duffel bag to the ground so he could shut Duo's mouth with his fist. Maxwell must have seen the look in his eye, because he backed up a step. Heero advanced.

Duo took another step back, then stopped. He dropped his bag to the ground and stood up straight and still. "That guy wasn't who you thought he was." 

Heero froze. "What?"

"I'm actually surprised you hadn't guessed what went on today."

The former Santa's fists fell back to his sides. "Relena's the informant."

"I can't tell you everything you want to know. I don't even know all of it myself." Duo stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jacket and stared at his shoes. "I do know that as the Foreign Minister, she knew who all the 'players' were in the Scholtzberg case, and agreed to give Preventer the benefit of her knowledge." Maxwell glanced up and looked Heero straight in the eye. 

"Why they didn't tell you, I can only guess. But you weren't always rational when it came to Relena. You followed your emotions with her, until you were afraid of getting hurt."

  Heero suddenly found his own shoes interesting. "I never said I was afraid…"

"You were afraid." Maxwell's voice grew louder, accusatory. "You still are afraid. Why, I can't possibly imagine." His voice grew closer, and it was Heero's turn to step back, away from what his friend was saying…

"I kept thinking you'd rise to the occasion, that you'd fight for her and in the process realize there was nothing going on - at least nothing romantic. But instead, you ran away."

Heero's head shot up. "I didn't run," he shouted back. He paused and lowered his voice. "I left."

"You left because you didn't want to get hurt."

Heero frowned. "You're damned right. There's no reason she should love me, and I couldn't live with her pity." He leaned down and picked up his bag. He didn't have time to stand out here and argue--

"There's no reason why those kids today should have told you the wishes of their hearts, either."

Heero pulled his duffel bag up over his shoulder and turned to go. "That's right. They're only going to get hurt when Santa doesn't bring them their gifts. And how can he bring them a new mother or…or…trips to Earth to find their parents?" Anger swept over him, hot and raging. He dropped his bag again as he reeled around.

"Their parents are dead!" His left arm pointed at the offending mall. "And this stupid myth about Santa Claus will only bring them more pain because they can't put the past behind them and move on."

"Like you can?"

Heero opened his mouth to retort, but nothing came out. He crossed his arms over his much leaner chest.

Duo took another step closer. "You don't know why she would love you because you can't lay the past to rest yourself. You can't understand why these kids will open their hearts to you when they're only going to get hurt." His tone softened a bit, or at least no longer sounded angry.

"But that's why they need people like Relena in their lives. So they don't end up, no offense here, buddy, like you. Afraid to tell the people you care about how you really feel."

Heero scowled at the ground. "You could have told me."

"I couldn't tell you. It was classified information; in fact, I wasn't supposed to bring you along today." Duo patted him on the shoulder and kept walking.

Heero turned to glare at his friend.

Duo paused and looked back. "The elf was supposed to get the list. I just made a slight modification. But I think it was worth it, don't you?"

Heero tore through his apartment, throwing his bag with the Santa suit on his bed before firing up his laptop from its suspend mode. His fingers flew over the keys, entering codes, and bypassing security locks with practiced ease. 

"Scholtzberg case, here it is."

"Warning: IP trace in progress." A red, blinking box blared on screen.

"Shit." Heero found and killed the process on the node. If Preventer found him in these files, he was going to be answering to a very cranky Administrator.

There were tons of documents, reports, and affidavits. Pictures, testimony, video files… He wanted to go to her tonight if possible. He couldn't get through all of this in an hour or two. He slumped into his chair and pulled up a likely report, looking for information…

* * * * * *

Relena took the earrings out of her ears and sunk down onto the bed. Her feet hurt, her head hurt, and her heart never could get used to the pain. Every year, she'd hear similar stories from kids on different colonies, or on Earth. It didn't matter where they lived, their scars were the same. She needed a hot bath, but couldn't summon enough energy to move.

RING! RING! Relena squinted at her watch through the darkness. Had she really been asleep that long? RING! RING! Her hand fumbled over the surface of the nightstand to find the phone.

"Relena."

"Who…Wufei?"

"There's a shuttle waiting to launch as soon as you can get there. We have a hacker. It could be nothing, we just don't want to take chances. Go."

The line went dead. She tried to rub the sleep from her eyes. She stumbled out of her bed, and had a bit of trouble righting herself. She opened the door and strained to see her guards through her limited vision. "We have to go." Her voice sounded hoarse. The one to her right nodded, and quickly moved to her side. She leaned on him a bit and they led her out of the hotel, into the waiting limo, and to the Preventer shuttleport.

It was chilly when she got out to board the shuttle, the faux winter air slapped her face, and woke her up a bit. She realized she hadn't put on her shoes, and felt a little silly, but climbed the steps and entered the cabin. She buckled herself into her chair and remembered having the thought that she would be home in time for Christmas with Pagan, after all. And then she was out.

* * * * * *

Heero felt like his eyelids weighed a hundred pounds. He tried to raise his head, but his neck protested lifting his head plus two hundred pounds of eyelids. He glared at the time stamp on the monitor that read nine-thirty in the morning. 

"Shit."

He had overslept. The Preventer groaned and stretched his cramped muscles. He needed a shower, and a shave, at the very least, and then it was off to go see Relena.

The hot water on his skin felt good, relief pounded into his body with its spray. The information he had gleaned from those reports proved Duo was correct. The Preventer whom Heero had thought caught Relena's interest back when they were dating was an undercover agent, asking her to get them information on Scholtzberg's committee dealings.

A married undercover agent.

He hopped out of the shower, toweled dry, and pulled on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He glanced at his image in the mirror long enough to check he hadn't missed a spot when he shaved, and curse at his reflection for being an idiot.

"You are an emotional moron. You'd better hope she'll take you back."

He flipped on the television while he finished dressing, wanting to hear the latest news.

"…Minister is back on Earth today to spend the holiday with her extended family."

Heero paused in the middle of brushing his teeth just in time to see Relena's picture on screen in front of her estate. 

"Dammit!" How was he supposed to get a shuttle flight to Earth three days before Christmas? It wasn't going to happen. Flights were booked solid, and he didn't have the kind of cash to buy a last minute fare.

"How could she leave? Why did she leave?" He ran both hands through his hair and tried to figure out a solution.

"I can hop one of the Preventer's freighters, or see if they have a shuttle scheduled to leave in the next day or two. Shit shit shit. If only I hadn't fallen asleep."

He slung the chair back and plopped down in front of the machine. He had to find a way to get to Earth. 

The sooner the better.

* * * * * * 

Relena tossed about in the bed. She didn't know why she couldn't sleep. She felt like she was still a child on Christmas Eve - even though there would be no presents under the tree aside from the ones already there the night before.

She closed her eyes and tried to fall back asleep. There was no reason a grown woman without children should be awake at four in the morning on Christmas Day. In fact, she usually slept in a bit….

Her eyes snapped open a while later. "Was that a noise?" She strained to hear if it would repeat itself. But the house was silent. She dozed back asleep again, waiting for Christmas morning to arrive….

**An hour later**

It was still too early. She just couldn't sleep. And lying in bed was making it worse. Five thirty was insane, but she could at least make herself some tea and toast. Her stomach rumbled beneath her gown as she stood up and pulled a robe on over it so she could go downstairs. She slipped silently through the darkened halls, but didn't want to trip down the actual steps. She flipped on the light and started to descend, but stopped not even halfway.

At the bottom of the stairs, in the last bit of the light from the upstairs hall, stood a worn and haggard looking Santa. Five o'clock shadow peppered his face, instead of a beard, and it looked like he had soot on his red jacket and pants. His hat was missing, or at least it fell off when he stood up, revealing the familiar shock of chestnut hair.

"Heero…" 

He stared up at her from below, looking like hell, but she knew she didn't look much better. It took an extra second to command her feet once she registered that he was really here. She practically flew down the steps only to have doubt creep in as she set foot in the living room. Why was he here?

"Relena…."

"What are you doing here?"

His eyes were red - probably from lack of sleep, and the expression on his face… She glanced down and noted that this exhausted Santa had managed to bring along his sack of toys.

"You're a mess."

He nodded. "I wanted to see you when you were still on L2. But I just missed..."

"You wanted…to see me?"

"You left to go back to Earth, and with only three days until Christmas, I couldn't get a flight. I couldn't get a Preventer shuttle either. I had to ride freight. It took two days. I've never seen a slower vehicle in my life."

"But…why are you here?"

"I brought them." He waved at the bag of things at his feet. "Everything I could remember. The bat, the glove, Kelly's dance shoes. I can't bring Kerridan a mother or Jason a father, but I can teach him to play baseball so he can get on a team. They shouldn't… No one should end up like me."

"What are you talking abou--" She stopped when she realized what he was saying. "You were there."

He visibly swallowed, then nodded.

"You…played Santa for all those kids? But…why? How?"

He frowned, but didn't look very angry - just tired. "It's a rather long, complicated story that will involve the deaths of two Preventer agents, may they rest in peace, but the short and the long of it is because I was meant to be." He looked up at the end of that sentence and met her gaze.

There was something there, in his eyes, something more than the obvious lack of sleep. She managed a small smile. "You heard my wish."

His shoulders sagged. "You never told me before."

"I did." She shook her head and tried to blink back the tears that were forming in her eyes. It wouldn't do to cry. "You just never listened."

"I was…afraid, before. But I'll listen now." He looked so earnest, so vulnerable. Like the wrong words would absolutely crush him.

"I…" She took a step forward and touched his arm. He, or maybe it was she, was shaking. "I love you."

"Still?" Heero asked in a whisper.

Relena nodded and lost the battle with her tears.

He pulled her against him; he smelled of aftershave and stale cigarettes, but she didn't care. She hugged him back and buried her face in his red Santa coat. He rested his head on her shoulder; his voice was low and husky when he spoke in her ear: "Then let me stay with you."


End file.
